Stealth Wealth – The Definitive Guide to Understanding that Money Talks (While Wealth Whispers)

Our guide explains the intricacies of stealth wealth in New Zealand. We explain the reasons behind many of our wealthy's understated lifestyle, which focuses on privacy, genuine relationships, and the real value of financial security over basic and boring conspicuous consumption.

Updated 6 April 2024

Summary

If billionaires are so wealthy and famous, why are they so "under the radar"? The richest New Zealanders (like Graeme Hart - the wealthiest) likely have more wealth than the bottom 50%+ of New Zealanders, and yet there are barely any media appearances or interviews about them online. It isn't a coincidence - it's intentional. “Stealth wealth” is arguably the reason why.
With the rise of shows like HBO’s Succession and Showtime’s Billions, which give an inside scoop on what it's like to be a part of a billionaire media conglomerate's family (and all the drama that comes along with that), an increasing number of people have started to see that wealth and power are not all they're cracked up to be.
While the story is fictional, the show highlights one key characteristic of some (if not most) ultrarich — Stealth Wealth. With income and wealth inequality likely to exacerbate differences between the haves and the have-nots, understanding stealth wealth and when it should be implemented in our daily lives has never been more important.
With wealth comes opportunities to show it. Those who have wealth have two options: show it or hide it. In an era where "Keeping Up with the Joneses" and "Keeping up with the Kardashians" were all the rage, there has historically been a strong emphasis on showing off wealth to the external world.
Stealth wealth represents a deliberate choice to prioritise the freedom, security, and peace of mind that wealth can provide over the social status it might confer. In a world increasingly obsessed with the trappings of success and the visibility of personal lifestyles, stealth wealth offers an alternative path focused on the intrinsic benefits of financial well-being. This lifestyle choice underscores a broader reflection on the values and priorities that define true success and fulfilment in life.

Our guide outlines:

MoneyHub Founder Christopher Walsh shares his insights on Stealth Wealth's existence in New Zealand:

"Among New Zealand's wealthiest, a distinct trend of 'stealth wealth' operates. These are people who, despite possessing significant wealth, opt for a life far from the glare of public attention and don't draw attention to themselves.

They live in ways that do not outwardly flaunt their financial capacity. While everyone is different, modest or high-spec homes, overseas holidays, and value-driven lifestyles are their trademarks, but it's subtle and tasteful. What they do isn't flashed around social media, and if it is, it's discreet. Such individuals generally work hard, invest discreetly, take risks, keep their financial affairs private, and shy away from flashy displays of opulence because it's a zero-sum game which attracts unwanted attention.

By doing so, they embrace a way of life that brings them financial and general well-being over the fleeting allure of social status. Their actions speak to a deeper cultural ethos in New Zealand, where genuine relationships, disciplined financial management, and being happy and content are held in higher regard than material extravagance. Stealth wealth, therefore, is not just a financial strategy but a statement on living a life that prioritises true success and fulfilment.

Contrastingly, the 'fake rich' phenomenon reflects our social media-driven world. What you often see on platforms like Instagram and Facebook, the flaunting of luxury items and extravagant lifestyles, tends to mask underlying insecurities. People showcasing a high-consumption lifestyle are frequently caught in a cycle of 'compare and despair', where the constant need to appear wealthy steals the joy and authenticity of their experiences. In reality, these displays are more about seeking validation and status than actual financial stability.

True financial security brings with it a different set of desires. Those who are genuinely financially secure often find their longing for luxury items diminishes. They understand that true wealth is not in accumulating things but in the richness of their lives and relationships. As the saying goes, 'comparison is the thief of joy', and it's dangerous if you get trapped.

Pursuing stealth wealth is not just about being understated; it's about being grounded in what's genuinely important in your life. Financial well-being is not measured by the luxury items you have but by the financial freedom, peace, and happiness in your life".

Christopher Walsh
MoneyHub Founder

What is Stealth Wealth?

Stealth Wealth involves deliberately hiding one's wealth from public view and avoiding displaying obvious financial symbols like luxury cars, high-end fashion, and extravagant lifestyles. Living below one's means, investing discreetly, maintaining privacy about financial affairs, and choosing not to flaunt wealth publicly are all well-known ways to exhibit Stealth Wealth.

Stealth wealth is an increasingly popular financial strategy and lifestyle choice among people who, despite possessing significant wealth, prefer to keep this fact private and avoid showcasing their financial status through conspicuous consumption or public displays.

What is the philosophy behind Stealth Wealth

The core idea behind stealth wealth is not merely to hide wealth in secrecy but to foster a lifestyle where one's financial success does not define one's identity or social interactions. It stems from a desire to avoid the unwanted attention, security risks, and social dynamics that can accompany visible signs of wealth.
People practising stealth wealth often drive modest cars, live in comfortable but unassuming homes, and generally avoid flaunting their wealth through luxury goods, high-end fashion, or expensive hobbies visible to the public eye.

What's an example of someone not exhibiting Stealth Wealth (Anti-Stealth Wealth)?

Anti-stealth wealth shows up in many ways, but the main three ways are:

What they buy
What they say
What they share (particularly on social media)

Examples of Anti-Stealth Wealth might look like:

Posting prolifically on Instagram about all the five-star hotels, first-class flights, private jets and luxury travel they're having.
Buying brand new luxury cars and chrome wrapping them in ultra bright colours like pink, neon, lime green and orange.
Wear a giant diamond ring
Openly bragging about how much wealth they have.
Acting condescending towards everyone else who is not as wealthy as them.

What’s an example of someone who’s exhibiting Stealth Wealth?
In contrast to the above, someone exhibiting Stealth Wealth might:

Not have any outward appearances of wealth
Wear modest clothes
Rent or own a modest (but clean) apartment or house
Drive cars that are 5 - 10 years old
Do not openly talk about money, wealth, or income
Not post on social media (and if they do, it’s not centred on lavish purchases)

Why would New Zealanders choose to pursue Stealth Wealth?

People react differently once they know how much wealth you have. For example, when you and your university mates were all studying together, everyone was broke, and everyone was likely viewed the same/equal. However, after 20 years of working and pursuing different career paths, friends may view you differently if they find out you have a net worth of fifty million dollars and they are struggling with a million dollar mortgage and a boring job.

This raises questions - would they expect you to pay for everything? Would they expect you to buy them lavish gifts or fly them out to see you? Suddenly, what was a very equal and balanced relationship has become very one-sided (whether explicitly stated or implicitly in the way they think and act).

There are a few other reasons to pursue Stealth Wealth:

Privacy and Security: The more money you have, the more money someone can take from you. By keeping their wealth hidden, New Zealanders can protect themselves and their families from being targeted for theft, scams, or personal safety threats.
Genuine Relationships: Most Kiwis want to build friendships with true connection and empathy, not wealth and money. The friends you make at school, university, work, and church, and doing your favourite hobbies are rarely based on money. However, as people get richer, relationships can get warped. Stealth wealth allows for the development of relationships not influenced by one's financial status, fostering connections based on mutual interests, values, and personalities rather than wealth.
Financial Discipline: The more you spend to show you're rich, the less rich you become (thanks to depreciation and the opportunity cost of investing). This approach encourages living below one's means, prioritising savings and investments overspending on luxury items, leading to sustained wealth growth and financial stability.
Stress Reduction: Avoiding the constant pressure to maintain and display a wealthy lifestyle can lead to a simpler, less stressful life, where personal satisfaction comes from experiences and relationships rather than material possessions.
Prioritising Personal Fulfilment: When you give up trying to show off to others, the wealth you’ve built up can now be diverted from spending to get public recognition to spending for personal reasons. Living authentically means avoiding the trap of social media showiness or the compulsion to acquire the latest trends, thereby sidestepping societal expectations.

What are the drawbacks of practising Stealth Wealth?

While the benefits of stealth wealth are significant, this lifestyle choice is not without its challenges:

Social isolation: By hiding their wealth, Kiwis might isolate themselves from others who share similar financial situations, potentially missing out on opportunities for socialising or networking with peers. For example, if you're keen on Stealth Wealth but you have friends who are in a similar position to you but want to "show off" and do all the lavish things wealth enables (that you're not keen on doing), you might risk alienating these friends (as they might go buy ‘Lambos’ while you're driving the old Corolla you've had for years).
Misunderstandings and assumptions: People may make incorrect assumptions about your financial status, leading to misunderstandings or misjudgments in personal and professional relationships. For example, if you've got enough wealth to retire early, some may misinterpret that as you being unemployed or not capable of finding a job (which you might not clarify for them given you're practising Stealth Wealth).
The stress of maintaining secrecy: Keeping wealth a secret can be stressful and mentally taxing. The need to constantly monitor what one says or how one acts to avoid revealing one's financial status can be burdensome. For example, Graeme Hart might have to consistently watch what he says on social media (or it might negatively impact his work to try and stay "under the radar").
Limited expression of success: After all that hard work building your wealth, it’s natural to want to celebrate and use it. Some Kiwis find joy and satisfaction in sharing the fruits of their success with others. Stealth wealth practices (like not letting others know how much you have) can limit the ability to openly celebrate achievements and milestones (e.g. if you reached millionaire status at 25, it might be awkward to try and share this with your other peers/friends who are deeply in debt and at negative net worth levels).
Reduced influence and impact: Wealth can be a tool for influence, philanthropy, or driving positive change. By hiding wealth, Kiwis may miss opportunities to use their resources to influence or contribute to causes they care about (the exception is anonymous donations, which allow the wealthy to support causes they care about without disclosing who donated those funds).
Potential for family tensions: If the practice of stealth wealth extends within a family, it can lead to misunderstandings or tensions, especially if the wealth is concealed from children or other family members who might benefit from knowing about and learning to manage it responsibly.

Must-Know Facts About Stealth Wealth

You likely live close to “Stealth Wealth” millionaires

Stealth Wealth is much more common among Kiwis than we think. Many millionaires practise stealth wealth, often living in unassuming neighbourhoods and working regular jobs. For example, if you own your home outright in Auckland, you're probably already a Net Worth millionaire.
While it may not seem like it, thousands of millionaires walking around New Zealand look like everyone else. People expect the ultrarich to stick out like a sore thumb, but the truth is that most rich people don't appear rich. It's far more likely that the real rich seem normal, and the fake rich (who try to show off their wealth) are far from rich.

You don’t have to practise stealth wealth ALL the time - just when it makes sense to

Going "too hard" at hiding your wealth can negatively impact your ability to enjoy that wealth. For example:

Want to take that lavish five-star resort holiday to Fiji but don't want to show off to your friends? By only booking a 3-star resort to ensure you don't "stick out", you've reduced your quality of living.
Want to buy that Hermes bag for your wife's anniversary but worried about what her friends might say at their next coffee catchup? You opt for the LVMH standard bag that everyone else has. Again, you've shifted your purchase so that it does not stick out, but it may have impacted the gift's quality and the purchase's quality in the process.
It’s okay to enjoy your wealth - but just try to spend wealth in the right ways.

Stealth Wealth is a fine balance

Between too much stealth wealth and no stealth wealth at all, there’s a right amount of modesty that people with wealth would be good to practise:

It's not too loud that everyone knows how much you're worth and thinks you're bragging.
Not too quiet such that you spend nothing and die with millions in the bank.

For some situations, sharing your wealth story is fine

It's okay to tell people about your wealth, but just be mindful of who and why you're telling them. Sharing your story is good; your close family and friends will want to support your success.
However, just be mindful that some will think you're bragging, others will get jealous, and some may get insecure about their own wealth (we are all humans, after all, and comparison is just something we naturally do).

The poor act rich and the rich act poor

Ever wonder why billionaires don't do more interviews? Often, those with no wealth (e.g. people with low incomes) try to show off wealth to others as a symbol of social status amongst peers. Those who have wealth (e.g. the rich) often do everything in their power to hide the fact that they don't have wealth. For example, Elon Musk notoriously lives in a tiny home, most hedge fund billionaires shy away from the public spotlight, and many do not "stick out" in public.
Whether to avoid scrutiny or targeting by those who might want to do them harm, the wealthy often practise stealth wealth as a way to stay under the radar and avoid uncomfortable conversations (e.g., if the NZ Herald published an article about Graham Hart's billions and trading activity, the IRD may come snooping), and not have relationships change as a result of their wealth.

Stealth Wealth is a mindset

Adopting a stealth wealth lifestyle involves more than avoiding luxury purchases - it's about cultivating a mindset where the value of wealth is measured by the security and options it provides rather than the external symbols it can buy.

While it's obviously more useful the more money you have, regardless of how much wealth you have, the practice of Stealth Wealth has many benefits. It makes you "financially invisible" while allowing you to focus on life's true essentials.

Stealth wealth is easier said than done

We live in a social, status-driven world. We all want to be accepted, liked and impressed with us. We all have an ego (no matter how big or small we want it to be). Having wealth isn't inherently bad, but the more money you have, the more likely money can amplify what you're going through (either positive or negative opportunities or problems). Wealth enables a better lifestyle, but wealth can also control us if we let it.

Don’t fall for the trap of showing off wealth - it’s often not as real as social media portrays

While there is a small subset of people that will be able to spend millions (or give off the impression they spend millions) from the hard work that they've done (either working a job, investing or starting and exiting companies), when you're in your youth, you just haven't had the physical time working in a job to be able to earn that much to justify the above type of spending.

As such, they're far more likely to fund their lavish purchases by debt, inheritance, winning the lottery (particularly if the person is young), or getting bankrolled by someone else (like their mum and dad).

Frequently Asked Questions

Is it dishonest to hide your wealth?

Not necessarily. Choosing privacy over public display of wealth is a personal preference and a protective measure rather than deception.Coming soon

How can I manage others' perceptions if I practise stealth wealth?

Focus on being authentic to your values. You can still enjoy a comfortable life without overt displays of wealth, and if questioned, you can explain your lifestyle choices as personal preferences.

Will practising stealth wealth affect my financial goals?

It can positively impact your financial goals by encouraging savings and investment over consumption. This approach can accelerate the achievement of financial independence and long-term wealth accumulation.

What is "Quiet Luxury"? How does that tie in with stealth wealth?

Quiet luxury is the concept of buying high-quality luxury items that are highly useful but don't necessarily signal to the rest of the world that you're rich. It's often quoted as what people wear in the show Succession, usually coming off as simple, elegant clothing that doesn't have any flashy brands (like Gucci or Supreme) on it but that most people can tell is high-quality.